Doesn't it cross your mind that you might not ever receive a valentine's card?
Standing at the side of the playground and clearly ridiculous in shorts as a junior- no valentine; senior school no better, in your twenties driving that Austin Allegro, in middle-age up in the loft with the Hornby train-set, still virgin and still no valentine.
And then you end up in the nursing-home (Valentine Ward) and a nurse Valentine (see above) bends down every day, looks you in the eye, and will not hand the thing over. Well join the club.

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